Friday, May 29, 2009

New Ranger Smith Story

PINING AMONG THE PINES
Ranger Smith is sitting in his cabin at his desk pining.
He stares longingly at a picture on his desk and sighs.

"How long have I been out here in this God-forsaken wilderness? Keeping order in the forest. And for what? The bears hate me. The trees drop their mess all over the forest floor. "
Mrs. Smith
We see the picture and it's of a very pretty young lady in her wedding veil. She looks lovingly at Ranger Smith. "Gee, I miss Mary." says Ranger Smith. "How long ago were we married? It must have been 10 years since I've seen her. You know, I think I'll take a break from Jellystone and enjoy that honeymoon we put off."
Just then he gets a call from the park supervisor about a rumor that some park bear is causing trouble and Smith better get to the bottom of it. "Yogi! That's it! I'm tired of getting to the bottom of every bear problem! And it's always Yogi's bottom!


The heck with this, I'm going to go home to Mary and forget about bear bottoms for awhile."

BOO BOO PATHOS

Ranger Smith goes to Yogi's cave and tells Yogi he's had enough of him and his childish antics. Yogi and Boo Boo are in bed. Boo Boo cries when he finds out Ranger Smith is leaving them. "Good riddance to discipline and rules!" shouts Yogi!

Ranger Smith leaves, "Well that's a load off! Now to lead a decent human life with my beautiful wife, Mary!"