Thursday, February 25, 2010

Jimmy's Gifts 2

Jimmy plucks up his loved one. George (playful): "You'll never guess what it iiiiiis!"
He produces a rectangular glob of processed meat. "It's a damn luncheon loaf, lad!
The mysterious loaf bounces on the table.
"That's a dadblasted olive loaf! 'n' it's all fer you! Cut the crap outta that sucker, boy!"
Jimmy wonders what feels so good and George tells him the secret. "That's GOD'S meat, son! Probably has every one of His creatures ground up inside! Christ hisself prob'ly doesn't know who the *%#@!! is in there! Mebbe even some Goddamned Angel Cows!"
They have a moment of silent prayer. Then Jimmy prepares to serve luncheon.
George can't wait to taste every one of God's creatures in one magnificent sparkling all-American loaf.
The loaf offers no resistance as Jimmy slices lunch up in a mad frenzy with his unspoiled virgin blade.

to be continued...with apologies to Danny Antonucci
just in case you thought I made this up...I actually had to eat this stuff at lunch when I was a kid! It induced instant puke every time.
Jimmy FrontJimmy Back

40 comments:

Eric Bauza said...

Luncheon Loaf... America's most nutritional resource!!!

Craig Something said...

I wasn't expecting such violence...
I LOVE IT!

Niki said...

I'm really sorry for this rap reference but I've been saying it all week.

"Murder murder M-murder murder M-murder murder"

Kali Fontecchio said...

I see where this is headed, yer a sly one Mr. Poo.

Tony said...

Hi John,
when are we going to dee this animated?

Saludos from Hamburg,
Tony

Katy Lloyd said...

I feel like a kid with a bag of sweets looking at these! Wow what a great way to start a Friday!

stupidpersondave said...

this is so awesome. your cartooning is great man, you keep reminding me why your the best at this with these comics.

Mickey Paraskevas said...

simply the best... i love this site... bravo.

Steve Hogan said...

What's grosser, the violent hacking up of George...or olive loaf?

No really, it's olive loaf.

RooniMan said...

Luncheon loaf cubes and sliced Liquor.

K. Nacht said...

Skewer! Fizzwon't!

Dave Jacob Hoffman said...

Samurai Jimmy!

Paul B said...

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I love George cut in pieces!!!

Shawn Dickinson said...

Cartoony magic!

The Butcher said...

Hahahahahha. Your cartoons are so violent!

Paul B said...

John, do you know why in the Tex Avery model sheets there are not front views of the characters?
maybe they will not use them?

David Gale said...

Loving these colour boards!

Chris said...

Paul - I think there are no front views in the model sheets because as John said, the model sheets were made from the drawings done on the layouts. So unless there was a specific need to have the character facing forward, it wouldn't be on the model sheet.

The practice of doing a rotation for the character wasn't how it was done initially.

I think. =)

Vauben said...

You've cornered the market Machete Madness...

I never could handle the blood and guts stuff. Do I need a warning...?

JohnK said...

Nah. My violence is always cartoony.

The Butcher said...

Cartoons have no vital organs and can reform themselves.

It's a good thing you didn't do this story for a children's show. Parents and religious crazies would have crapped themselves and worried that kids would cut people to peices to eat olive loaf. Like kids would ever eat olive loaf.

Craig Something said...

Took a couple of looks to notice the loaf has a face.

coolhand said...

lunch loaf is gross.

Raff said...

>>...with apologies to Danny Antonucci<<

Not until George starts yelling f*ccia di m*rda caca figlio di str*nzo etc. etc.

Reminds me - have you considered producing the cartoon in a different country in another language, then having it translated for U.S.?

nktoons said...

George Liquor getting chopped to pieces is hilarious! Liking the strip, the colors are great. Olive Loaf!? Yuck!

ChanceToScoopUpGatherer=0.5 said...

Make it so.

talkingtj said...

i also ate olive loaf-theres also the mysterios "spice" ham and lets not forget "cooked" ham-the things they fed us still disturbs me-i know all the parental units meant well and ive suffered no lasting ill effects i can determine but when youre middle aged and you still cant figure out what that stuff actually is - its disturbing! george liqour has an open invition to all the mystery meat i will no longer consume-gods meat for gods manly man.

Rusty said...

George Liqour 100% American Sushi.

Alex said...

Jimmy the Idiot Boy drawings are always funny to look at. A good example for us all, these drawings.

Trevour said...

I never really minded olive loaf when I was a kid (since I LOVE green olives), but the REAL good stuff was ham & cheese loaf. We used to fry it up while camping. I don't eat that crap anymore though!

Sven Hoek said...

OLIVES??!??

I thought those were anuses.

Oh well, it's better than a poke in the eye.

Marty Fugate said...

Yeah. You'd like to think them suckers was olives. Hate to break it to you, but they's cross-sections of something ...

Well, too dad-blamed horrendous to even mention.

Marty Fugate said...

Reminds me of the time I projectile vomited directly into the garbage can of the lunch room of Sarasota Junior High. The grits did it to me. They popped right out of the lunch tray in a vacu-formed mold. The freaking grits WOBBLED at the end of my fork. I ate 'em anyway out of pure spite just to prove I could do it.

Bad decision.

georgeliquor said...

"with apologies to Danny Antonucci"
Jimmy reminds me of Ed...only cuter. I'd NEVER buy an Ed plush toy, like I did with Jimmy. *squeezes my retard doll*

Also...is George alive?

Kristina said...

I like this story. Gives me warm,, fuzzy feelings. Like how my dad let me play with the family machete when I was little. Cartoons can be strangely realistic...

John Atkinson said...

The idea of Jimmy with a knife makes me shiver with fear.

Nicol3 said...

No. You've done some risk-ay things in the past John, but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, OLIVE-LOAF IS TAKING IT WAY TOO FAR.

They'll never let you do it. Not on TV. Think of the children..

HemlockMan said...

Olive Loaf...I used to see that stuff and thank almighty Jove that my parents never bought any. That's something you could just look at and know that it would make you heave.

yawn said...

Yea, when I first saw Ed, I thought he reminded me of Jimmy also. Ed looks like a demented version of Jimmy.

RocknOats said...

John, I'm deeply disappointed! I thought at first you were going to recognize the glory of Olive Loaf(let's not forget it's zippy cousin, Pickle and Pimento Loaf!) then I read on and saw your blasphemous comments! Forced! Olive Loaf IS a gift right from heaven! It's sandwich plus salty side snack all in one! No more brine-y fingertips for you! So sad right now...